Actually, We Can’t Track Packages

Barbara Comstock (in)famously said that, because we

…can track packages coming in here all the time; we can track people…

Well, then we can’t track people because, it appears, we can’t track packages. According to the vendor I’ve just ordered a package from, the shipper is (I kid you not) recycling its shipping numbers. This leads to the anomalous tracking “history” for my package shown below:

Tracking

Reading from the bottom up, you can see that my package got processed yesterday, then was subsequently transferred to the post office and delivered, sixteen months ago. Later that same day, it was scanned and began its journey to (I hope) me, going from some unspecified location (called “United States”) to Columbus, to New Stanton. Where (and when) it will go next is not clear at this time. Reading that history, “this time” isn’t even clear at this time.

To be fair, I took Comstock out of context. The history above is from UPS, and Comstock was talking about FedEx. Then again, maybe she just forgot who paid her…